COZUMEL

Most people never go on vacation. 'Not enough money,' they say. 'What, cash in my RRSP to sit on a beach somewhere and get sunburned?' 'Not gonna mortgage my house so I can afford to travel.'

I don't have an RRSP or a house. What I do have is the ability to save up around a thousand bucks and go away for a week or so a few times a year. No, I don't have kids along. Yes, my girlfriend pays for herself (splitting hotel costs in two is always the best way to save) and no; we don't stay in luxurious resorts. Clean, safe accommodations within walking distance of local restaurants and activities are what we seek.

Friend, chances are that you or someone you know is also a Thousandaire. If you desire vacation time and have the ability to be selective with dates and destinations, there's no reason why you cannot enjoy a vacation of your own.*
*your enjoyment may vary

It was with naught but enjoyment in mind that we grabbed a cheap flight to Cozumel, Mexico. Basically paying only the taxes and fees, we took advantage of a deal on a direct flight into Cozumel International Airport, just outside the main island town of San Miguel.
Cozumel is located off of the Yucatan Peninsula across the water from Playa Del Carmen, due south of the famous resort of Cancun, which has become a spring break destination for the 'Girls Gone Wild' set. We're a little past that scene, as we long ago discovered our preference for sipping fine tequilas as opposed to slamming shots of the discount paint-thinner variety.

Disclaimer: I speak fluent Spanish. My girlfriend, however, does not, and she had no problem making her way around town on solo excursions. Many Cozumeleños speak English, and those that do not are helpful in a friendly 'finger-pointing' way.

The essential way to get around Cozumel is to rent a car. All the best beaches are outside town, and the island is quite small, you can drive the entire way round in about 90 minutes. The car rental agencies are across the street from the airport, and booking ahead through Expedia will, secure a great price. As with any local airport in Mexico, avoid at all costs being sucked in by promises of better deals on rentals, hotels, or Cialis by the time-sharing presentation folks; just make a beeline straight across the road to the rental agency. Be aware that the additional insurance is mandatory to drive in Mexico. As for the class of rental car, we gladly stuck with the compact size, as the town streets are quite narrow. Unless you're staying at a big resort, you'll need parking. While street parking is an option, your best bet is a private lot (look for the large 'E' for 'Estacionamiento') which we were able to negotiate for about $10 for the week. (This is where speaking Spanish can be handy!)

We stayed at the Suites Colonial due to a friend's recommendation. We booked the room through hotels.com and at the time, this was the best value. Prices and availability may vary according to season, so do a search on Cozumel at hotels.com before you book.
Our hotel was just off the main Zocalo, and we practically had the place to ourselves the whole week. The rooms could be a little brighter, but with a kitchenette with fridge to store our beer, water, juice and snacks (bought across the street at the OXXO market) and an air conditioner in the bedroom, the 53 dollars a night we paid was a great deal. Every morning we walked a few blocks to sister hotel Casa Mexicana for a delicious full breakfast that is included. Score yourself some good Karma and make sure to tip the breakfast chef and wait staff!

After breakfast you'll want to hop in your car and head over to Playa San Martin, an undeveloped stretch of beach which is simply Paradise. No vendors and no cruise ship tourists, and there is a limited amount of Straw Palapas for shade, but no chairs, so bring towels to sit on. At San Martin itself, there is no food or drink service, so unless you're going to drive down to one of the great Seafood restaurants on the east side, you're going to have to bring food and drink along. Bringing a soft collapsible cooler from home is a cheaper option than picking one up from the San Miguel Mega (Walmart equivalent.) If you want something more than beer, water and snacks, you can grab some Tortas (sandwiches) from any of the innumerable places in town, or grab some chicken in a bag from a roadside stand to take with you.

While waiting a half hour to swim after eating may be an old wives' tale, there's nothing false about being aware of the surf conditions when swimming anywhere on the east side of Cozumel. All but the strongest swimmers may wish to stay less than waist deep in the water, especially on days of rough surf. Yes, lifeguards do patrol these beaches on occasion, but the undertow can be extremely strong even on days when the waves are deceivingly low. For experienced swimmers, swimming and body-surfing in this open ocean is fantastic.

After a hard day in the waves, you'll have worked up an appetite, so the freshest seafood and most amazing Margaritas can be had at Playa Bonita, about halfway down the eastern perimeter road. It's definitely more of a 'locals' place than the more touristy 'Mezcalitos' beach clubs at the north or south end of the road. Playa Bonita closes when the sun goes down, so make sure not to miss out!

As far as beaches on the west side of Cozumel, that's where you'll find all the snorkeling action. Calm, clear water is the norm here, but unfortunately so is the proliferation of 'beach clubs' meaning deck chairs and cruise ship tourists. However, it's a big coast, so drive south of town, park the car and go for a walk along the beach until you come to an isolated stretch that suits your fancy. Remember: there's no such thing as a private beach in Mexico, and they don't charge for parking. Beach access is open to all, only the use of chairs and facilities are charged for. Plenty of (fairly pricey) food and drink options will surround you if you don't feel like bringing your own that day...but even what seems like pricey for Cozumel seems cheaper when you keep things in context: when was the last time you paid two dollars for a beer in Canada, or had a complete meal for two, including drinks for under $20? It's worth paying a bit more for drinks or a meal on the west side of the island in order to enjoy some truly spectacular sunsets.

As far as nightlife in San Miguel, Carlos n' Charlie's is there for those that prefer the wild gringo scene, but we spent most of our nights crooning away in a small Karaoke bar right near our hotel....karaoke is huge in San Miguel, with big and small clubs alike offering a wide variety of experiences. Most nights we had the place practically to ourselves, and the playlists were unbelievably diverse-everything from the current hits to Mexican rock to the 70's and 80's hits and alternative tracks we grew up loving.
When it came to dining out, while we did enjoy a lovely charcoal-grilled steak dinner one evening, complete with (unfortunately) chilled red wine (the restaurateur claimed the cruise ship crowd demands it that way,) most of our evening meals began and ended at LOS OTATES. Tacos, Quesadillas, and the traditional Mexican soup Pozole were what filled our bellies for the week. Frequented by locals and tourists alike, there is simply no place like it for deliciously grilled Mexican food at cheap prices. Sure, having a drink or two and some appetizers at Casa Denis in the Zocalo is a nice experience, but the same price will get you a belly-busting meal at Los Otates.

So, what about some fun other than just lying on the beach? Well, the one advantage of the ever-present hoards of time-sharing reps that roam the island is that in exchange for 1.5-2 hours of your time, innumerable perks can be yours, according to your desires. Be it a day at an all-inclusive resort, free jeep rental, snorkeling trip, or scuba trip, one could literally spend the week going to a different timeshare presentation each day and then enjoying the fruits of their labors. Be aware: it is quite a 'hard sell', and be prepared for the unpleasant stares of those who know they won't be making a sale. We chose the scuba option, and enjoyed our first beach dive so much I contacted the dive company for a second boat dive which I paid for (around $70.)

For those wishing to go to the mainland, the vehicle ferry is a bit pricey (about $100 return) but essential if you want to drive down the coast to explore the ancient Maya ruins at Tulum on your own. Along the way are spectacular Cenotes (underground caves) offering snorkeling and diving in crystal clear freshwater caverns. A pedestrian ferry across to Playa Del Carmen is cheaper and faster, offering more flexibility, but you'd have to take a bus or tour down to Tulum. Although the vehicle ferry trip seemed lengthy (about 2.5-3 hrs) the return trip in the evening offered a fantastic view of the stars that we enjoyed with a bottle of wine on the upper deck.

THE MATH:
Car: C$65.49 (total approx. $200 including gas and insurance)
Air: C $768.00 (for 2)
Hotel: C$383.98
Food/Drink/Incidentals/Duty Free...all up to you, but our Grand Total for the week for everything was under C$1100 each including tax. What a way to spend a week in Mexico!

Suites Colonial

View from Casa Denis

Taco at Los Otates

West Coast Beach

Playa Bonita

East Coast highway view

East Coast Highway view

Margarita at Playa Bonita

Playa San Martin

View inland from the East Coast Highway

Meal at Los Otates

View from the Vehicle Ferry

Tulum

Menu at Los Otates

Karaoke Star.

Mexican Zoo.